Daily Journal: June 16, 1998

Image via Dreamstime.com

The itch is getting really, really bad now but I’m too embarrassed to go to the doctor! I will DEFINITELY wash the next pair of underwear I buy from a guy on the street! I guess I’ve learned a few things, though. Namely, A) ‘Fruit of the LOAM’ is NOT a major brand, B) if a pair of underwear appear to be made out of attic insulation then they probably are, C) if the phrase “please send help America, I am twelve and supporting a family of nineteen on 52 cents a day and am not making enough money to buy dogs for food” is stitched into the waistband, I should probably ask for a discount, D) most legitimate underwear dealers do not also specialize in Three Card Monte, E) when you open a brand new three pack of underwear the only things in the pack should be underwear and NOT toenail clippings, band-aids, spent bullet casings, chewing gum, or fishhooks. Oh well, I gotta go. I just heard about this guy who sells what I’m told is “the best sushi in town” out of his van. I’ll let you know!

Originally published at https://www.clifhaley.me on January 10, 2022.

--

--

--

Sometimes I eat pizza with a fork, but usually not. I also have a podcast version of the stuff I write over at https://scriblets.com.

Love podcasts or audiobooks? Learn on the go with our new app.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store
Clif Haley

Clif Haley

Sometimes I eat pizza with a fork, but usually not. I also have a podcast version of the stuff I write over at https://scriblets.com.

More from Medium

In “The Power of the Dog” a tale of two lonely strangers picks up against the backdrop of a barren…

7 Short Colourful Fiction Stories

To be Mortal — Chapter 2. Professor Jozef Merville

MMMBye: Breaking Up with My Favorite Childhood Band